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A few weeks ago Brooke and I decided we were going to surprise you with a t-shirt release in July! While talking about the idea, we knew that we wanted to re-release a design from the past, and after throwing a few on the table, we decided on our "Faith Can Move Mountains" design.
The design is inspired by what Jesus said in Matthew 17: 20, "Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
After selecting this design, we ordered a few samples and went on with our daily life. Around the same time, I volunteered to help Brooke's brother Taylor and his wife Kelsey and refinish their deck and upgrade their privacy fence. They happen to live next door, which was super convenient for the job, plus I have been enjoying non-computer work, so I was excited about the opportunity.
The first day I worked on the deck, I felt very weird. I felt like I wasn't using my time correctly, or like I wasn't "productive" enough. It was very odd, and after we put the kids in bed after that first day, Brooke even asked me, "Is everything okay?"
I explained how I felt like I wasn't "productive" enough today. How I was feeling like I needed to be "working on regular job things" and "life things", yet how I also felt irritated at myself for feeling that at all because I was doing one of the two greatest commandments, "loving my neighbor." We ended up pausing our show and talking at length about how crazy it is that as followers of Jesus, we can look at one of the two greatest commandments as "not productive." I've conditioned myself that "more", hustle and "go, go, go!" is the only thing that counts towards having a productive day. And somehow the point that listening to Jesus and following His words doesn't outweigh that. What's wrong with me? That's crazy!
After speaking with Brooke that evening, I realized that I was at the core, feeling off and un-productive because of my lack of faith. My faith was telling me that if I took the time to sand, stain, paint, and build for my neighbor, as a way to love them, that God wouldn't provide for me, so I needed to stop and provide for myself. (This might ring true more for those of us that are self-employed because we understand that there is more riding on the time we put into our jobs and the paycheck on the other side. Or at least, that's how we feel.)
It was on day two that I started thinking about the phrase "Faith Can Move Mountains" and how loving someone takes faith. What working on my neighbor's deck was actively teaching me was that I struggle with believing that God will provide at times. Not because He hasn't before, but because I think that I need to take control of that aspect. Brooke and I tithe and give, which I know is an act of faith, but that ends up feeling like a line in our budget more than an act of faith. As I sanded and painted, I began to realize that I often have a hard time giving my time as an act of faith. I want to be in control of how big of a part I play in providing for myself and my family, so at times, I've eliminated God from that equation.
When I asked Kelsey + Taylor if they would be open to the idea of me working on their deck, I honestly just wanted to learn a new skill while being away from a screen and spending time outside. (Mostly, I wanted to listen to audiobooks + podcasts while working with my hands.) But what I didn't expect was to gain a fresh perspective on how I view my faith. I didn't realize that by the time the paint and stain had dried, and the tools were cleaned up I would have come to recognize that at times I've only asked God to move mountains out of my way, so my life could be more comfortable, instead of asking him to move me so my faith could be stronger. If our faith is strong enough that we believe it can and will move a mountain, it should move us too.
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